Coming back to running is tough. Whether an injury, a baby, a major life change, a “break” in the normal pattern of training is difficult to come back from. I’ve been recently struggling with numbers. Miles, times and pounds have had me down for awhile. It’s nothing I’m losing sleep over, but these are things that drove my training in the past, and , now, I find them discouraging. On my runs, I’ve been thinking about my goals, and I’ve come to the conclusion to just BE.

I’m just gonna BE pushing a stroller and loving the gaze and smile of my new son. He will grow up seeing, just as my daughter did, the importance and the fun of an active lifestyle. He will know his stroller for years, and someday, he will ask to run, too. He’ll eat his snacks and hand me his trash. He’ll ask questions and point out the dogs and bikes along the trail. I’ll have to make bargains with him as to when he can get out and run or play in the park when we’re finished.

I’m just gonna BE on the trail. I’ll take the dog, because we never spend time together anymore. I’ll take some detours (which I never do), maybe I’ll even discover something new. I’ll enjoy the scenery, because I’ve got plenty of time to roam. And I’ll enjoy the quiet, because those moments are few. I’ll notice people, and even caravans of horses, with patience.

I’m just gonna BE in a race. I’ll start toward the back, because (if you’ve been at different places in the pack, you know) that’s where the fun is. I’ll learn about people I don’t know, I’ll encourage runners on the hills, and I’ll cheer on others as they finish. I’ll make eye contact at aid stations, making sure to thank volunteers AND throw my cup in the trash, because someone’s gotta pick it up, otherwise.

I’m just gonna BE in love, with the sport, with my family, and with the beauty that surrounds me every moment. Right now, I’ve got more important things to focus on than the miles I’ve logged, the time at the finish, or the pounds I’ve lost or gained. For now, at least, I’ll leave my Garmin at home.