Woo! I'm excited (see photo)!

So, what does that mean? Why was I chosen to be a Marmot? What do I have to write about? What do I have to offer you all?? I have been told by many (and have even said it myself) that I have a "good story." But, it feels weird to say that because it is not a story I want to have. Except for the latest part. And maybe that is the part that makes it good, that makes it matter. And maybe that is what I have to offer. So here is the short version of the last few years of my story. 

In short, the last few years have been not easy for me. In 2014, I was diagnosed with clinical depression. In 2015, I was (wrongly) diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis. And in 2016, I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. Needless to say, my running suffered. While I was able to run through the depression, and know it was helpful when it did, it often felt impossible to get out the door. I went on medication, was in counseling, and getting out the door was easier. Then, in December, I fell and, after many of my joints swelled up to unnatural size, was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis. My joint swelling and pain kept me inactive for the first half of 2015, but in mid-July, I got a new doctor. He disagreed with the diagnosis and told me I could start running (along with any other physical activity) if/when I felt up to it. So, I started. It was hard and I was slow, but I felt great about running. I had my sights set on doing the Rescue Run and making 2016 my comeback year.

I completed the Rescue Run (slowly) and was signed up for the Winter Series, but I also knew something was, once again, wrong with my body. After feeling terrible during Winter Series I, I finally went to the doctor. Two weeks later I had surgery to remove a large cancerous tumor growing on my ovary. Recovering from surgery was slow and hard. Then, just as I was starting to feel okay, I found out I needed chemotherapy. My "come back" kept getting pushed back. But May 13, 2016 (Friday the 13th!) I had my last chemo infusion and on August 25, I was officially in remission! 

So, I lost an ovary, gained a scar and had to push my "come back year" to 2017. And, so far, it is going really well! It has all be tough, but I feel lucky that it was not tougher; I know it is for a lot of people. And, I have no intention of making it a little come back. I have waited long enough for it so I figured I should go big. Initially going big meant the ascent. I have done the ascent before, but knew if I was able to do it again, and do well, I would really feel like I was back, that I was healthy. Problem is, I hang out with friends who go even bigger. Their influence wore off on me and I siged up to do the Crested Butte 55K in September!

It all has been exciting, but scarey. I am excited to see what I can do, but I am scared that I won't be able to do it. I am scared that I won't do as well as I want to. And, I am scared that I will have another set back, that I am fooling myself about 2017 being my come back year. But, I can't focus on that, I have to keep pushing. I have to keep running. Because it's what I do, it's what I love. And I'm excited (and slightly scared) to share it with you all.